Last time, Brienne was struggling through the early days of impoverished sunstroke and showcasing her poor sportsmanship. This time, we finally get the legacy show on the road.
Alright, confession time; I didn’t plan very far ahead for this legacy. My StoryProgression mod has a bad habit of pairing off every available sim in town within the first game week, so I really should have known to hunt down the ideal Mr. Gallant from the get-go. As it is, I didn’t do that, and I’ve been watching the little newlyweds notifications go by with increasing alarm. I had a vague idea that Brienne might marry Connor Frio, as sort of a contrast between her jockness and his nerdiness, but he recently had a shotgun marriage with Molly French and is officially off the market.
Naturally, of course, this means I set Brienne up with his jerk brother.
She’s recently had another promotion, and celebrates by running off to party at Varg’s Tavern, the only bar in town that doesn’t actually serve drinks. There she runs into Jared Frio, the only eligible bachelor in town, and his puppy Tiffany. Tiffany promptly blows my mind by summoning the first gnome of the game while barking at the fridge, which I didn’t even know non-player pets could do.
Brienne is also disconcerted.
Brienne: Sir, are you aware that non-player gnome creation is strictly forbidden due to extenuating lag, not to mention pathing issues, and is subject to a fi-
Jared: What the hell lady?! It’s just a @*?#-ing dog, let it go!
Brienne: Sir this is a serious offense! We are only on the first generation of this legacy, we must keep this town as uncluttered as possible!
Jared: I ain’t no part of your stinking legacy, am I? What’s it to me? Buzz off!
Love at first sight, kids.
It’s at this point that none other than my main man Hank shows up.
Hank: Oh my plumbob what is that woman doing. This is no way to bag yourself a man!
As the only one with any real sort of romantic experience(after all his Lifetime Wish is Heartbreaker), Hank takes it upon himself to save this legacy from itself and play wingman. He starts ‘casually’ chatting with Gunther Goth LITERALLY RIGHT NEXT TO BRIENNE AND JARED DUDE NOT SUBTLE
Hank, out of the corner of his mouth: He’s wearing a fry cook uniform, talk to him about food.
Brienne: Over the past week I have consumed only cereal and juice.
Jared:…That’s horrible. Don’t you even have a stove?
Brienne: Not as such, no.
Jared: Do you even know how to cook?!
Jared: Well damn, that’s just sad. Here, tell you what; home-cooked meals. Hit me up anytime.
Brienne: Oh no, I couldn’t possibly intrude…
Jared: Trust me, you’d be doing me a favor. The favor of me being able to sleep at night. Cereal and juice. *shudder*
Rough start aside, they do eventually start chatting civilly, and then move on to the basic romantic interactions. Jared doesn’t seem too impressed, but at least there aren’t any negative results.
Brienne’s first autonomous romantic interaction is to compliment Jared’s propriety(LOL). A second too late, I remember that he’s inappropriate and probably won’t take well to that, but…
Jared: Miss me with that sappy shit boi
Two steps forward, one step back. They do part on good terms, but they didn’t get anywhere beyond flirting and hugging, which for our needs is useless.
At this point I was sitting in front of my computer, getting more and more frustrated. First Jared autonomously yelling at her, then getting next to no progress with netting a spouse, its pretty irritating. But whatever, I thought, the next day is Leisure Day, the summer holiday. Brienne should have plenty of time to woo him then.
Boy howdy, I had no idea.
Leisure day dawns bright, sunny, and full of hotdog-eating competitions.
Brienne is so nervous about making this date amazing that she doesn’t even notice the burglar eating a sno-cone three feet to her right.
Not that an arrest in the middle of the date would’ve made a difference. Jared turns her down for a first kiss, despite being good friends and thinking she’s ‘extremely irresistible.’
…Alright. Not a problem. He’s just gonna be a bit of a harder nut to crack, that’s all.
Brienne flirts with him some more, gets the flirting rolling again, and…
Brienne: Would it perhaps make a difference if I confessed my feelings to you in a whisper, my dear?
Brienne: You are making this very difficult Jared.
The whole thing drags on so long that the date finally ends. Apparently it was epic, even though all she did was stuff her face with hotdogs and get turned down all day long.
The first thing Brienne does once she gets home is autonomously change into her badass formalwear(which you can’t really see in this pic. Darn.) and roll up a wish to invite Jared over.
“What the hell,” says I, and he drives on over.
I don’t know if it was the epic date, the cool formalwear, or the depressing reality of Brienne’s living condition, but Jared finally, finally, lets her get her smooch on.
Brienne wastes no time in getting him to agree to be her boyfriend so that StoryProgression will keep its grubby mitts off of him…
…and why stop there? By the end of the night, they’re Mrs. and Mr. Brienne and Jared Gallant, and I’m ready to go scream into a pillow. But hey, we officially have a new member of the legacy!
Jared’s traits are Heavy Sleeper, Party Animal, Inappropriate, Natural Cook, and Mean-Spirited, and his Lifetime Wish is to be a Celebrated Five-Star Chef. He and Brienne are polar opposites, which should be fun. I guess we’ll see if they stay together or end up shouting the house down!
Brienne was actually rejected more times than I showed, I just stopped taking pictures at some point. According to my notes Jared rejected her FIVE TIMES in total which is just. Wow.
Playing it was exhausting, too, because it was basically just spamming romantic interactions and then shouting at the screen when he shrugged her off. Ugh. But look at this:
I have some Ideas on how I want to characterize Jared, but I’ll have to see what material the game gives me to work with. X) At any rate, that’s me in for today, I’ll have another update up tomorrow! Leave a comment or even just like this chapter if you enjoyed it, it means a lot to me and really helps with motivating myself.
Thank you everyone for reading! -Mo